i came to have a chat with You last night, but all the doors were locked. Guess that whole “turn the other cheek” rule doesn’t really apply when it relates to waiting room couches, eh?
Anywho, what i was hoping to talk to You about was the stress that has come into my life, especially as of late. i’m really not to cool with it, and Your whole routine of “God never gives you more than you can handle” is starting to wear a little thin. In case You’re not keeping score, i am currently dealing with:
– a wife with multiple health issues
– strike that, a wife with multiple health issues who refuses to admit that i need to worry about any of them…
– a father dying from cancer
– a father realizing he’s dying from cancer
– watching my parents relationship (finally?) crumble after almost 50 years
– a “career” going absolutely nowhere, and no Flippin’ way to get out of it
– a co-worker who is OFF. Her. Nut. (seriously, You know her – i am Not making that part up)
– knowing (KNOWING!) that my best efforts are not good enough to keep my family above the poverty line
– and me, going back into therapy, simply because i’m so damned tired of feeling wrong all the time.
i know, i know – You’ll tell me that a lot of people have it a LOT worse. And You’ll tell me that a lot of the above i either brought on myself and/or am “stealing” from the rightful owner. And i’m pretty sure that You’ll let me know once again that one chapter does not a book make. And i will lower my head in resignation when You do, because of course – You’ll be right.
But don’t you see?
That’s a big part of the problem. Did you ever have a “big brother” who was always right, always Daddy’s favorite? Pretty hard to follow that kind of act, i’ll tell ya. i mean, Jesus Christ! (no pun intended), i get the whole “pick up your cross and follow me” thing, but how long did your cross-bearing last any way?
As long as all that, eh?
Still carrying it, 2,000 + years later, and all because of people who are like me?
People who ARE me?
Well, thanks for that, at any rate (see – told Ya You’d be right). Hey, next time, could you at least have the doors open? Those couches really do look rather comfy.