To say I’m becoming obsessed with the Flash In The Pan word prompts is just a touch of an understatement. In addition to the word limit placed upon us by Red, I am also enjoying – well, “enjoying” is most likely not the right word to be used here – the mandate I placed upon myself with these prompts; that being to address topics that I would normally not feel comfortable in doing so with. Crawling much deeper down the well than intended with the prompt of “Come,” as always, I welcome your feedback and constructive criticism…
Anyway, it’ll be good seeing dad again.
At least I hope too.
Pretty painless, these pills. Still… Didn’t realize they’d make my hand melt like that.
They just sorta walked off, ya know? All of ‘em. Abandoned me. Didn’t need me anymore.
I don’t need me anymore.
I don’t need…
So tired. Tired of being alone, a postscript,
Time to go home.
Nice to go home… Or’s it “come home?”
Crap… Slidin’ outta view, everything. Blurring. Coming soon, “The End.” Hehe…
Why did I?
Oh damn. Now my whole arm’s melting…
You there dad?
To those of you who read Friday’s post, this is an unintentional “book end” to the daddy motif I started there. As ma is still alive, I was concerned that by using a parent of the “fairer” sex as my character’s sought out post-life guide, I might miss out on some of the emotion I was hoping to evoke with this piece. Then again, should I have failed at even that, I suppose I could always just wrap this whole thing up with a depressing Smiths song as well…
The way you formatted this really enhanced the scattered, almost unreliable narrator quality. Of course, that made me love it.
Thanks Lance – I’m glad that it helped instead of hindered, as I was trying very hard to get you *into* his head, instead of simply describing it.
i never know how to phrase these things, i don’t just want to say i liked the post very much – because i know that soon, this kind of comment would become somewhat replaceable.
but i did like the post. and i like the song, too. the words you chose painted an authentic picture, and i that’s what i think is the hardest part about writing emotionally risky posts like this one. i totally believed that this could be someone’s train of thoughts.
and anyway, i have a soft spot for anything dark and sad.
so, thanks :)
I’ve found that the best fiction always has more than a sprinkle of non about it. Thank you for your kind words and your support of the risky posts – I feel as if they make the “safe” recipe ones all the more enjoyable =)
Excellent song choice T…I’m glad you’re flashing with us..this is really impactful.
Much thanks m’dear, and much more thanks for opening the door for me – I am forever in your debt.
Thank you dear. It means a lot, and I hope I don’t screw up your image prompt =)
T-if you would like….http://anhonestdayortwo.com/2013/08/20/humbly-honored/
Again, my thanks to you beautiful. I am honored.
The formatting adds so much to the actual fading from life. Very effective to the story, Troy.
I really appreciate that Tess, and I’m glad that it helped in explaining what was going on (I was afraid it would look more like a trip than a suicide).
Great way to step out of the comfort zone. Suicide is hard for most to conceptualize, much less put into words. This is a terrific flash.
Thank you so much Red. I’m glad it came off as more true than contrived =)