You know what I said last week about finding inspiration for these pictures? Yeah, well this week none of that happened, as the very second the prompt picture popped open, I shouted excitedly – and to no one in particular – “PEN PALS!!!”
That’s right, this week’s Friday Fictioneers immediately made me think of the pen pals bit I wrote a little while back for the 100 Word Song challenge, and I thought we’d revisit these kids now to see how they’re doing, cool?
Hope you enjoy!
Wanting to touch her cheek, he reached out slowly, till his fingertips softly tickled the image on the screen before him.
They were so much alike, yet different. They were so very connected, yet far apart, each firmly entrenched to their own place.
He longed to traverse those few thousand miles, but was unable to break himself free. So instead, he continued sending pictures and words across the ocean, hoping that she would see in them, his love for her.
Sighing, he wondered what she was doing at that moment.
Wanting to touch his constantly tossled hair, her fingertips softly brushed the image on the screen before her…
I enjoyed the gentleness in their communication, specifically how they considered each other without really considering the distance as anything more than space.
Good point k~! But I suppose in the end, is it really anything more than that?
I’m liking this story line, and would like to see where it goes next – how about you?
It sounds to me like you are enjoying the partnering with Ela, and a different type of storyline to write. I say follow your heart. The readers will follow when you do.
That was fun, and it was good to finally overcome my fear of collaboration. I might look into doing this more often!
As to the piece Ela and I did, I’m none too sure how much farther it could go – but then again, even as I just typed that, about a 100 directions came to mind… =)
Food for thought k~, food for thought!
I was in a long distance relationship for over 3 years (Montreal / Ohio), and this is dead on descriptive of how it feels to have to rely so heavily on words and emails and pictures, wistful and lovely. As always ;) Um, and if you’re going to continue their storyline (yay) might a suggest an eventually happy ending? They seem to sorely lacking lately, and when you write joy it lights up the screen…
Oh thank God! I was really concerned that this would come off as being too “canned” in nature. Glad to hear that someone with real life experience bought it as legit!
And I don’t know about that happy ending… But what the heck, as I never realized that my joy writing had that affect on your screen, I’ll see if I can’t give ‘er a spin!
It must be a strong force keeping him down, to make him “unable to break himself free” … the longing comes through, and I’m glad they at least have photos and communication to keep on.
Sighing, he wondered what she was doing at that moment. * “What is he doing this very moment?” she wondered sighing… Then, from her corner of this universe, she closed her eyes and quietly embraced him with all her soul.
I love how and what you add to my story, Ela >.<
I think if it’s an ocean, a few hours, another state, or the office next door…that if you miss someone, can’t touch them physically or emotionally your heart aches.
it happens even between best friends with no romance in the middle of it. Right now I’ve been missing my best friend very much because of distance, we talk, we text, but I really want to hug her, I really want to see her smile when I tell a joke or well up when my own eyes do.
this was written very well, because I felt the ache of not being able to….and now before I start humming “So Far Away” ….
loving your stories lately.
Thank you Kir =) I’m glad your liking these!
I am, it’s like you’ve opened up and I like the “peek in” you’re giving us.
your heart and your words are GOOD.
It is amazing what our hearts call love.
Right? And who’s to say it’s not.
Yes, cause who really knows what love is? Not me. Although there have been plenty of times I thought I did.
Troy, I enjoyed what you did with this piece, deftly showing their long-distance relationship and the yearnings engendered by it. Too bad they didn’t have Skype! I can recall talking forever on the phone and now I think how nice it would have been to be able to see that person or send a picture.
Although I found “tossled” in the online urban dictionary (so perhaps you meant it that way), the “accepted” spelling is “tousled”. :-) Just thought I’d mention it and hope you don’t mind.
Thanks for catching that Janet, but this week I’ll stand by urban dictionary if you don’t mind =)
And I’ll also see if I can’t invest a little extra, and get these two kids Skype as well!
I would hate a long-distance relationship and almost had one once when I was dew on a rose. Relationships are hard enough without fighting time and distance. Good rendition, though. I enjoyed reading this one.
I don’t know, I think if both are invested, they could make it work, and I’m learning that a big part of relationships being hard is our inability to keep them easy and honest, you know?
As always, your story melts my heart. I can feel his yearning to touch her. To know her even more. To feel her. There’s so much intimacy between them, considering they’ve never touched in the physical sense. Sometimes, touching each other in the emotional sense, means so much more.
Thanks Renee! So, you’re not like, going to get your heart melt all over my blog, are you? Cuz, that would be sorta grody… =)
No T I’m not. Even if I did, it would be like chocolate. And my dear man, chocolate is never grody. Giggle, snort!
Troy, it’s amazing the kind of relationships that are being built as we speek.. I constantly come across people that actually have made it through and finally met. The most amazing is that we learn to know each other inside out rather than outside in.. finally it could be a truth in the saying, it’s the inside that counts.
It really is a new world now, isn’t it Björn? And what you said about our insides, I truly hope will be a lesson we can all learn very soon indeed!
You captured the longing of a long distance relationship, the hanging on every printed word. The joy of reading the other person’s voice and despair in not hearing from him/her for extended periods. Wondering if they’re thinking about you at the moment you’re thinking about them.
You struck a chord with me.
I’m glad I could do so, Rochelle. Thank you for sharing that with me, as it means a lot =)
a powerful picture u painted with the story..
I’ve been witness to long distance yearning, and you captured it well.
Thanks Nelle – I’m glad I could bring it to life =)
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I’ve been in long-distance relationships at times. You got it pretty much spot-on.
Thank you David!
Loved that you gave the reader the feeling they were connected yet miles apart! Nice job…really nice peaceful moment of being together but yet not really…nice writing!
Thank you Lotta – I appreciate your appreciation =)
This was really nice, but I want him to shake himself free and get on that plane, or do whatever it takes to see her in the flesh and tell her he loves her.
Very tender and sweet and captures the way souls can be connected even though apart.
The ‘like’ button didn’t load (it’s over here, not there) – and here’s looking at you kid. Well done.