We’re getting a new professor over at Master Class 2013.
In addition, k~ asked me to this week refrain from writing about dead people or people seeing dead people – maybe even try something life-affirming for a change…
These modifications of course, make me nervous. So much so, that – as you probably guessed from today’s title – I totally blew my usually self-imposed 150-word limit.
No worries though, I’m still Times New Roman, double spaced and one inch margined, all ’round.
So, understanding that this week’s twist is fitting the prompt sentence somewhere within the body of the text (versus being at the beginning or the end) below is week six’s submission for Master Class 2013:
Seeing her smile, he felt like a safe cracker who – partly by luck – had sussed out the first digit in a lengthy, arduous combination. She was more of a puzzle than she was a safe of course. But in the idea of locating the first two pieces to match, you just don’t achieve the same sort of satisfaction. Or so he imagined. Oh hell, he had no idea what he was trying to describe.
But that’s the way it was with love, now wasn’t it? He was unsure, as he had never felt this before. Not True Love at any rate.
He could hear his soul nudging him, “Shut up and talk to her already, you fool!”
Working up the nerve, he met her vacuous gaze while nervously scratching out a hello of sorts. All while his trembling body gave hint that – upon hearing her response – it might very well simply fall apart at each and every seam.
Before she could speak however, the gruff voice of the store manager intruded forcefully from behind, saying, “Sir, I’ve told you before – you frighten the other customers away, when you talk to our mannequins like that.”
•••
Shannon chose for this week, from Lev Grossman’s “The Magicians.”
•
Yeah, I just went there.
oh no you didnt. hahaha. not dead people but still creepy. nice twist.
=)
Thanks Kath!
Hahahahah. Love, love the ending. And here I was all set to tell you “So that’s what men think.” Bahahahaha. This is fabulous.
Thanks SAM! And maybe that really is what men think… =)
I don’t know if I should applaud or be appalled. ;)
A bit of both, I should imagine =)
PS. New MC up on my blog today. :)
I saw, and I’m struggling my way through the prompt sentence as I write =)
Thanks too for the nod – I truly appreciate it!
You are very welcome. You deserved it!
Hahahaha…Troy you made my day! I will giggle about this until it gets dark and maybe into darkness as well!
Always glad to hear you giggling, Lotta!
I actually snorted when I read that last line. Hilarious!!
a damn good thing I wasn’t taking a sip of water at the time!
A snort and water can be a dastardly combo – glad you liked this Carrie!
t, I have yet to be disappointed by a single post of yours and this is no exception. I loved that you used the safe cracking nuance in terms of judging someone’s mood or personality to get your desired result. And the ending? AWESOME…it actually left me wanting to know what happens when the lights go off at that store ;)
Thanks so much – but no worries, one’s bound to pop up sooner or later =)
Until it does though, I hope you stick around and continue to enjoy!
I love this! Unique, terrific ending, tenderly creepy! I loved your opening monologue as well!
“Tenderly creepy.” You’d be surprised how often I hear that… =]
Thanks Steph!
Ha! This had me laughing out so loudly that my kids thought I had lost it. I love it!
So glad it gave you a rise Deana!
Heh heh. =D
=]
You are such a tease m’Friend. This was a fun story that made me laugh when I got to the part about the mannequin. Nice job :-)
stankmeaner is right about the safe cracking portion of this story, it was really well done!
I try k~!
I’m so glad you liked it – you were right about lightening up in here a bit =)
And a good conversation was had… nice one.
We’ll never know (or maybe we will?) – thanks Nelle!
Hahaha! What a great piece! I loved this. The buildup was perfect.
And I don’t mind if you write about dead people.
Thanks Tina – rest assured, I’m not thinking I can delve too deeply into “mannequin fiction,” and I’m sure the dead will come back sooner than later =]
Oh how I love that ending! And not a word about dead people, though I’ve never had a problem with that.
I had a lot of fun once I realized how it would end, and I’m glad you liked it Renee!
No dead people; only mannequins! Fabulous.
Much thanks!
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this was absolutely perfect…the best way to end it or begin it.
this is why I love your writing, it makes me think…it makes me laugh, it makes me want to write. :)
Stop it Kir! You’re making me blush, in all the usual blushy spots.
You’re just awesome everywhere! This put a giant shit-eating grin on my face & I’m high-fiving you across the inter-webberverse!
LOLLL!! That is hilarious!
=)